What is a Life Coach?

To answer a lot of questions (and to engage in a bit of shameless self-promotion), I wanted to explain what a “life coach” does. This is one facet of the work I do and, judging by the response, it is something I am good at. I use the information provided by the Birkman Assessment to produce a Coaching Report Workbook. This, along with a person’s personal coaching goals, provide the basis for the relationship.

"Part therapist, part consultant, part motivational expert, part professional organizer, part friend, part nag -- the personal coach seeks to do for your life what a personal trainer does for your body."- Minneapolis-St. Paul Star-Tribune

"Once used to bolster troubled staffers, coaching now is part of the standard leadership development training for elite executives and talented up-and-comers at IBM, Motorola, J.P. Morgan, Chase, and Hewlett Packard. These companies are discreetly giving their best prospects what star athletes have long had: a trusted adviser to help reach their goals."- CNN.com

What Is A Life Coach? A life coach uses their personal experience and knowledge to help someone else achieve their personal goals and ambitions.

Personal coaches assist their clients to achieve their coachable goals. Clients set their goals and the reason they hire a coach is to accomplish their goals.

Personal coaches have expertise and training in some areas, but are more focused on helping their client. Coaches assist their clients to become the world’s leading experts on themselves.

Personal coaches are Equal Partners with their clients. Coaches are like a copilot sitting in the passenger seat of an automobile traveling to the same destination. Coaches do not do the driving, but they sometimes read the map.

Personal coaches do not answer every question. Coaches encourage their clients to find the answers that have virtually been there all along.

Goals that are best suited for the coaching process require clients to grow and improve to accomplish them. Coaching clients reduce their stress, increase their energy, make better decisions, increase their life balance, increase their peace of mind, and focus more on what is really important to them, BECAUSE of participating in the coaching process.

Clients have almost total control over the results they reap from coaching. Coaching clients set the goals they want to achieve through coaching. The purpose of hiring a coach is to achieve their goals. Their coaches concentrate on the goals achievement. The achievement of the predetermined goals produces the results desired and more. The choice is simple, control the process with consulting or control the results with coaching.

Clients develop a strong personal bond and trusting relationship with their coach. The very personal nature of the coaching process requires clients and their coaches to develop a very strong mutually trusting, mutually respectful and mutually focused partnership.

Coaching clients receive all of the fame and adulation that goes with participating in the coaching process. Personal coaches avoid the limelight or taking any credit. Plus, the coaching process is very confidential and private, and unless the client says something, no one will even know a person has a personal coach.

If you have questions, drop me an email.

Suffer

As the economy weakens, there are more and more cases of child abuse being reported. According to an April 16^th Reuters story, these new cases “are part of a spike in child abuse in United States during a recession that has driven some families to the brink and overwhelmed cash-strapped child-protection agencies. In the last three months we have twice as many severe inflicted injury cases as we did in the three months the previous year," said Allison Scobie, program director of the Child Protection Team at Boston's Children's Hospital.

Two thoughts:

There is more to life than money.

Isn’t it tragic that the innocent are often the ones to suffer for things over which they have no control?

Selective Love?

Disagreeing with someone doesn’t mean that they have become your enemy. This is the way of the weak and insecure. The idea that we can only befriend those who think like us is flawed. Difference in beliefs is not a declaration of war. The wisest way of life is to love everyone – including our real and imagined enemies. As Friedrich Nietzsche wrote, “The surest way to corrupt a youth is to instruct him to hold in higher esteem those who think alike than those who think differently.” Truth does not need to live in isolation. Truth can thrive in the midst of those who deny it.

Life Unscripted

Living in a media saturated culture has an effect on how we see life. Because we have seen so many movies and watched so much television, it seems to have tainted everything about us. We quote lines that we have heard in films and on television. We wear had-me-down fashions that have appeared on celebrities. Our schedules revolve around what time our favorite shows are on the telly. We rehearse situations as though we are actors or actresses preparing for some climactic scene.

This media obsession can easily color the way we view Scripture. Instead of understanding it as a record of the lives of ordinary people, we approach it as some kind of epic. When we come to stories such as the Woman Taken In Adultery in John 8 we forget that this is a narrative and we consider it as a production. In our minds it is as though a director began John 8 by saying, “Okay people. Today we’re recording John 8. I trust you’ve all studied your lines. I don’t want a lot of ad libbing—after all this is Scripture. As you hopefully know from the script, this is a big conflict scene between the Pharisees and Jesus. Now, those of you in the crowd, I want you to act shocked when they bring the woman on the stage. Where is my woman caught in adultery? Is she back from wardrobe? Good—Okay, doll. When the Pharisees drag you in, I need you to look terrified. Where’s Jesus? Jesus! Come over here. Now, big guy, I need for you to be “in the zone” WHEN THE Pharisees bring this gal and throw her at your feet. You’re not intimidated by these guys—you know what they’re doing! Okay, everyone think they’ve got it? Places, everyone—Okay, cue the rising sun. People start gathering on the temple set and action!”

Believe it or not, this was not how it happened. God’s Word records for us the events as they unfolded. The writers are simply bearing witness—testifying to what they have observed. The people who appear in the Bible accounts did not have advance notice of the day’s events. They did not know at the time that their words and actions were going to be recorded for us. There was no script memorization, no rehearsals, and no search for the motivation of the characters. No, the Bible is a “real time” document. It is reality television without the television.

Each day is not a rehearsal for the rest of our lives. Today is not a dress rehearsal for life—it is life. There is no preparation for ministry—preparation is ministry. We spend so much of our time and invest so much of our energy in preparing for the next big thing and there isn’t always a next big thing looming in the dawn. Each day, each hour, each moment is life. There is no pause button. Life is real time. And, for good or for harm, you and I encounter life’s events as they occur. We do not have the luxury of reviewing the filming schedule for tomorrow. We cannot ask to see the script. (Some would tell you there is no script.) Either way, we “do not know what will happen tomorrow” (James 4:14).

So, since we know that we don’t have the luxury of memorizing our lives, does this resign us to haphazard living? Yes and no. Not knowing the exact route does not mean that we do not know the destination. Not knowing the play by play does not mean that we do not understand how to play the game. And, having accumulated a bunch of knowledge through the course of our lives thus far, we have a wealth of knowledge to draw from for today.

Best of all, we have today. We don’t know the entire screenplay, so we can’t know for certain how close to the end we are, but we have today. We may or may not have had our heroic moment, but we have today.

Risking It All

Our desire for authentic relationships presents us with a strange paradox. On the one hand, we desire to be loved for who we are. In order to be loved for who we are we must be known for who we are. Yet, in order for that revelation to take place, we must be open and vulnerable. So we are left with a choice. Either we remain safely contained within ourselves - lonely, but secure, or we attempt to share our selves, which at best could lead to the relationship we have always craved or, at worst, to rejection. It is not an easy choice. It was not meant to be easy.

The vast majority of people crave a safe relationship. Millions spend their lives in search of that one who will love them in spite of who they are. They seek relationships that are committed. In other words, people are looking for relationships that will not change at the whim of choice or at the change of a mood. In the book Quality Friendship, Gary Inrig relates a moving story of the commitment that existed between two friends. It exemplifies the type of commitment we seek in our friendships. Writing of two World War I soldiers, Inrig writes of their inseparable relationship:

They had enlisted together, trained together, were shipped overseas together, and fought side-by-side in the trenches. During an attack, one of the men was critically wounded in a field filled with barbed wire obstacles, and he was unable to crawl back to his foxhole. The entire area was under a withering enemy crossfire, and it was suicidal to try to reach him. Yet his friend decided to try. Before he could get out of his own trench, his sergeant yanked him back inside and ordered him not to go. “It's too late. You can't do him any good, and you'll only get yourself killed.”

A few minutes later, the officer turned his back, and instantly the man was gone after his friend. A few minutes later, he staggered back, mortally wounded, with his friend, now dead, in his arms. The sergeant was both angry and deeply moved. 'What a waste,' he blurted out. 'He's dead and you're dying. It just wasn't worth it.' With almost his last breath, the dying man replied, 'Oh, yes, it was, Sarge. When I got to him, the only thing he said was, 'I knew you'd come, Jim.”

Who would risk everything to be at your side? There is one who already has.

Is there anyone that you love enough to give all? If not, you haven’t yet loved.