Risking It All

Our desire for authentic relationships presents us with a strange paradox. On the one hand, we desire to be loved for who we are. In order to be loved for who we are we must be known for who we are. Yet, in order for that revelation to take place, we must be open and vulnerable. So we are left with a choice. Either we remain safely contained within ourselves - lonely, but secure, or we attempt to share our selves, which at best could lead to the relationship we have always craved or, at worst, to rejection. It is not an easy choice. It was not meant to be easy.

The vast majority of people crave a safe relationship. Millions spend their lives in search of that one who will love them in spite of who they are. They seek relationships that are committed. In other words, people are looking for relationships that will not change at the whim of choice or at the change of a mood. In the book Quality Friendship, Gary Inrig relates a moving story of the commitment that existed between two friends. It exemplifies the type of commitment we seek in our friendships. Writing of two World War I soldiers, Inrig writes of their inseparable relationship:

They had enlisted together, trained together, were shipped overseas together, and fought side-by-side in the trenches. During an attack, one of the men was critically wounded in a field filled with barbed wire obstacles, and he was unable to crawl back to his foxhole. The entire area was under a withering enemy crossfire, and it was suicidal to try to reach him. Yet his friend decided to try. Before he could get out of his own trench, his sergeant yanked him back inside and ordered him not to go. “It's too late. You can't do him any good, and you'll only get yourself killed.”

A few minutes later, the officer turned his back, and instantly the man was gone after his friend. A few minutes later, he staggered back, mortally wounded, with his friend, now dead, in his arms. The sergeant was both angry and deeply moved. 'What a waste,' he blurted out. 'He's dead and you're dying. It just wasn't worth it.' With almost his last breath, the dying man replied, 'Oh, yes, it was, Sarge. When I got to him, the only thing he said was, 'I knew you'd come, Jim.”

Who would risk everything to be at your side? There is one who already has.

Is there anyone that you love enough to give all? If not, you haven’t yet loved.