Life Lesson III - A Perfect World

I used to hold to this idyllic ideal that one day everything would be fine. My life would be pleasantly predictable. There would be no issues with relationships, no financial pressures and no worries about the future. Then, because everything was fine, I could live in my dream house living my dream life doing all of those things I dreamed about doing. Because everything was fine, I would begin doing all of those things I knew I should do. I would invest more of my time in my relationships. I would write more faithfully. I would be a better steward of what the Father had given me. I would pray more. Because all of the stresses and struggles had passed, now that everything was going well, I knew I would begin living the life I always wanted to live.

Everything is never going to be fine. No matter how much I put off, the days of no concern will never arrive. Jesus says in John 16:33, “In this world you will have trouble.” It may be relational trouble, it may be financial challenges, it may be health issues, it may be emotional trials or any other of a hundred things. In this world, everything is never going to be fine. There will always be some challenge or dilemma.

So, I am learning that I should live the life I am called to live now. There may not be another chance. If my heart attack had been fatal, there is so much I would have never done because I was waiting for another day. There will never come a time when everything is going my way. But, there will never come a time when the Father is not walking with me. Regardless of my present circumstances, the time to pray more is now. The time to invest in my relationships is today. The moment to give more is this moment.

"I have told you these things, so that in me you may have peace. In this world you will have trouble. But take heart! I have overcome the world." John 16:33

My third lesson: There will never be an ideal time to do what is right. I must live obediently regardless of my circumstances.

Life Lesson II - Life Together

I heard Floyd McClung say, “God is not trying to hurt your pride – he is trying to kill it.” God made his move in my life during the past year. 2008 was a year of dismantling the self-reliant Bodie and rebuilding a Bodie more in the image of a follower of Jesus. With the career shift and the heart attack, I have had to accept financial, physical, vocational, emotional and spiritual support from other people. What I now know is that I much prefer to be the giver rather than the receiver of help and support. I like answering questions much more than asking them. When I ask for help, it highlights my dependency on others. Letting someone else be strong magnifies my weakness.

For many of us, self-sufficiency is a worthy objective. We like the idea of not needing anyone. I’m not saying that we don’t care for others nor do I mean that we do not value relationships. But, we do not want relationships to become indispensable. We are happy in relationships that have a definite limits and restrictions. As long as those relationships do not infringe on our independence and autonomy, we are happy. But, when “wanting” turns to “needing” we often turn away.

Doubtless much of this independence is good old American rugged individualism. But such independence is incompatible with the teachings of Jesus. We were created to live in relationship with one another. Luke’s description of the early church reveals the kind of interdependence which followers of Jesus are meant to experience.

“They devoted themselves to the apostles' teaching and to the fellowship, to the breaking of bread and to prayer. Everyone was filled with awe, and many wonders and miraculous signs were done by the apostles. All the believers were together and had everything in common. Selling their possessions and goods, they gave to anyone as he had need. Every day they continued to meet together in the temple courts. They broke bread in their homes and ate together with glad and sincere hearts, praising God and enjoying the favor of all the people. And the Lord added to their number daily those who were being saved.” Acts 2:42-47 (NIV)

As I allow myself to rely more and more on my brothers and sisters, I find myself relying more and more on my Heavenly Father. By relying on him and on his children, I am discovering that I am actually better prepared to stand on my own two feet when I must.

My second lesson - Self-sufficiency is incompatible with following Jesus.

Life Lesson I - The Unbreakable Bond

While I was in the hospital celebrating my heart attack, I had a few moments of lucidity. I am still trying to put some pieces back in the puzzle, but there are a few occasions that stand out clearly. One of them was my faithful friend Jon Rolph standing at my bedside asking me if I was going to write about what I was learning. Like an idiot, I told him I would. The reason for my reluctance is not that I do not enjoy writing; instead the reason for my lack of enthusiasm is the transparency that this will require. My heart attack was the proverbial “icing on the cake” of an already challenging year for both Kathy and me. To tell the truth about the lessons I have been learning is going to require me to drop a significant amount of pretense and posturing. But, it is time that I employ a bit of authenticity to share with you what I have learned.

The first lesson I want to share with you is that the Father’s presence is not always an invisible force. We sometimes go all X-Files when we begin talking about the Father being with us, almost as though he is some sort of phantom stalker. There were times when he was an invisible presence. Waiting in the operating room, staring out of the window in my room – those were times when I knew he was there, but he was not seen. Closer than my breath he would stay and remind me that I was not alone.

But more often than not, the Father is present through his children. When I at last arrived home and could lie in bed holding Kathy’s hand, it was to me holding the hand of God. As Joel drove me home from the hospital, I broke down twice as I told him of some of the trauma I had experienced - it was like sharing it directly with my faithful friend Jesus. Because Kathy and Joel have the spirit of Christ alive in them, his spirit could reach out to me through their lives. With each visit, each prayer, each call and each card, the Father was there in the lives of his children.

My first lesson – the Father does not abandon his children.

Yearbook

I have developed an unfortunate habit over the years - I try to forget the bad things that have happened in my life. Maybe I took the old High School Yearbook cliche "Remember the good times and forget the bad" too seriously. I do not want to think of my failures - only my successes. I do not want to remember my mistakes - only my triumphs. I can recall those who I have helped - I try to forget those I have harmed.

All of my life - the successes and the failures, the triumphs and tragedies - all of it is a part of who I am. Through good and bad, the same Heavenly Father works to accomplish his purpose in my life. He loves me for who I am - even the parts of me I want so badly to deny.

Spirituality and Religion

Running Hawk of the Lakota Nation is reported to have said, "Religion is for people who are afraid of hell, spirituality is for people who have already been there." Two recent studies in the online versions of the Journal of Pediatrics and the Journal of Adolescent Health seem to testify to the truth of Running Hawk's words. The studies report that teens with chronic illness are helped by a sense of spirituality. According to the studies, "Spirituality is defined as one's sense of meaning or purpose in life or one's sense of connectedness to the sacred or divine." A knowledge of the spiritual helps to make sense of suffering and place it in a proper perspective.

Modern Christianity is uncomfortable with the idea of suffering. Instead of Jesus' call to die to yourself, many modern churches preach that it is God's desire to keep you healthy and wealthy. Knowing that Jesus died penniless after a horrific death on the cross, it is amazing that such an idea can be communicated with a straight face. Jesus seemed to be unaware of such prosperity guarantees when he prayed that he would not have to drink of the cup the Father gave to him. But the great difference is that Jesus did not sacrifice for his own benefit, instead he did what he did for the sake of others and in obedience to the Father's love. He did not obey the Father to avoid hell; he obeyed the Father by following him into hell. And by doing this, he demonstrates the difference between the worship of self and authentic spirituality.